Fifty and Furthermore's Blog

Sane or Crazy? You Be The Judge

Recently, I was asked if I’ve ever done anything that other people thought was “crazy.” Crazy is not a word in my lexicon. I don’t really know what it means. But I became thoughtful about the question for a few minutes and this is what came to mind.

Who knows if my acts were sane or crazy? “Aye, there’s the rub.” Most of those out-on-a-limb moves, happenings, challenges and changes are risk-taking, out of the ordinary and probably a little of both. What I do know is that my own different life beats have always been to my own drummer, and that’s both scary and exhilarating.  Sane? Crazy?  Who knows? I’m a well-respected “shrink,” author and media personality who's supposed to know.  However, the longer I live, the more I Sage, the less I know how to judge certain behaviors. I don’t believe we really know how to judge these kinds of acts until time has passed and we know what we’ve done with the results of our experience. It’s in the looking back and telling our story that we evaluate our own life pattern.

Two times specifically come to mind. The first was after my home burned and I experienced a number of other personal tragedies in a three week period of time. After a period of hardship, off I went, traveling around the world, seeking something (what?), living in India, returning to India and adopting 2 Indian children. (There’s more to the story of course.)

The other time is now. I decided to become a voice for change in America. I learned how to confront a computer, wrote books, started a website and then started a major e-zine to launch this New Year's Eve that extols Saging instead of Aging. This last venture may be totally nuts or a success, either, neither or both. I do know it’s about one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. The outcome is still uncertain. Crazy? Maybe. And maybe just crazy enough to work for me.

Senator Larry Craig Lynch Victim Or Tired Politician?

This is really about vacation and reality. When I’m away, I usually leave a means of contacting me in case of family emergency. Thus, far away from my east coast time zone, my cell phone rang at 4:00 AM Maui time to a reporter’s questions about Senator Craig’s psychological make-up. Personally, I don’t care about a politician’s personal life. Nor do I believe media should hold as much power as they do over a public individual’s life. However, in our current media-oriented society where every story is milked to its fullest, talking about someone’s dynamics interests me far more than any judgment.

I have no idea what the truth of Senator’s Craig’s sex life is, nor do I know why the media and what appears to be shoddy police work broke a long term politician. However, I responded to the questions with years of experience and knowledge embedded in me.

I’m glad it wasn’t a family crisis. But once up, I took the time to watch the ocean and view a most incredible moon.  World events, media and personal desires co-exist. Sometimes they appear to work against each other. Sometimes, they flow in conjunction. This time conflicting agendas worked to awaken both sides of my brain.

As far as what I think about Senator Craig’s possible dynamics, the story can be read below. Of course, we may find out that the accusations are trumped up. Still, it does not speak well for a long term politician to fold. If he is innocent, I regret that he did. If he is guilty of sexual thoughts that conflict with his public stance, so what? Aren’t we all guilty of personal deception at some time? If the latter is true, I hope he gets help. If the former is true, shame on all of us, including Senator Craig for giving in.

The story can be read below:

http://abcnews.go.com/US/story?id=3538418&page=1

Over-medicating America

According to a recent news story on CNN, the CDC has reported that antidepressants are now the most prescribed drug in the US. Experts suggest that this rise is directly related to television ads that cause people to go to their doctors and request antidepressants they don't need, rather than seeking help from a psychologist. The article has some scary real-life examples of this. As a psychologist myself, sadly I see it happen all the time. And those over fifty often suffer more from drug interactions and over-medication than most people realize. 

Blue days ARE and will be part of life, whether you're under or over fifty, but simply feeling down one day, no matter your age, is not grounds for running to the pharmacist. Anti-depressants can help when depression lasts a long time for no known reason and is NOT situationally appropriate (ie related to a specific unfortunate incident). But for most of us, simply talking out our problems can go a long way - be it with a family member, close friend or a therapist. Learning to live life and not follow Madison Avenue messages is healthy for mind, body and spirit. I say get rid of ads and get back to real life connection.

Men and Depression

I recently came across a study that was published in the October issue of the American Journal of Geriatric Psychiatry that agreed with my own personal research on older males and depression. The study found that older males actually have an 8-fold higher suicide risk than women due to them being less likely to seek and receive treatment for depression and related issues. This is indeed a serious issue among Sages, and you can read the full article here. I also discuss male psychology and how to combat depression in my new book due out next month, When the Man You Love is Ill.

Men and Depression

I was pleased to find this lead article on a little addressed topic, men and depression, as the cover story of Newsweek’s February 18th issue. I address the same issue in my chapter on Understanding Your Man in my upcoming book (When The Man you Love is Ill: How to cope without losing yourself due in stores in May).

From Newsweek:

Researchers Finding New Ways to Diagnose Disease with Screening Tests, Provide More Effective Treatments and Drugs

NEW YORK, Feb. 18 /PRNewswire/ --
Six million American men will be diagnosed with depression this year. But millions more suffer silently. unaware that their problem has a name or are unwilling to seek treatment. Instead of talking about their feelings, men may mask them with alcohol, drug abuse, gambling, and anger or by becoming workaholics. And even when they do realize they have a problem, men often view asking for help as an admission of weakness, a betrayal of their male identities.

Read the full article here, it is well worth it. I will address the issue more fully later this spring under
Dr.Lynn’s Articles on my website.